Helpful Info...

I just found out about this website: www.betterworldshopper.org that shows the most socially & environmentally responsible (and not so responsible) brands, stores, and companies for common things we buy.

That whole list on the left (in purple) has different categories you can check out for quick, easy reference. They rank them based on:

• human rights


• the environment


• animal protection


• community involvement


• social justice

I'm so glad to have this information. This fits great with the goal to spend money more consciously and support companies that reflect positive values.

This Moment

Each day I am exploring and releasing my attachments to defining things as good or bad and the judgment of myself and others. (It is a continual process - letting go, seeing it is back, letting it go again...etc.) Often defining things at all takes me out of the experience of what is and takes me out of trust/faith. Peace comes in those moments of letting go and releasing into acceptance of whatever is happening.

My father-in-law sent the following to me and I really, really like it:

Life will give you
whatever experience
is most helpful
for the evolution
of your consciousness.

How do you know
this is the experience you need?

Because this is the experience
you are having
at this moment.

-Eckhart Tolle

About Last Time...

I've been feeling like I would like to share the unfolding of my last trip to India, seven years ago. I was living at the ashram in Austin and I had known for while that it was approaching time for me to get married. I knew I wanted a marriage that would grow me spiritually and that it was time to take some action but I didn't know what it was. So I prayed for an answer. The answer that came was that I had to go to India.

It happened a lot like this time. The answer came and it consumed me until I had the plans laid. A few weeks later, I was on a plane.

The experience of India was profound for me in many ways. It was profound to be in a place full of Sikhs and history of this path I have chosen. It was profound to be in a place where the unexpected is always underfoot and you have no choice but to trust that God will cover you. It was profound to be at the Golden Temple and feel that I had fulfilled a deep longing of my heart that I never even knew I had.

On March 16, I went to the Golden Temple and made a prayer for my marriage. Six months later - exactly - on September 16, was our wedding.

We may not know where we are being led or why. But so much in life right now is about surrender and trust. I don't need to know - I am just grateful for the journey.

The Day Approaches

One week til departure. Each day we put the pieces together a bit more: Satvinder details, house sitting, work coverage, packing plans...it all is coming together or somehow will in the next few days. This is a portion of the supplements we have gotten to take as part of a program that will hopefully keep us from getting sick. Last time I went to India, it took me 4 months to rid myself of the sickness. India was TOTALLY worth it - but if I could avoid getting sick this time, that would certainly be preferred!

Meet Cindy

Satvinder's class has been working on doll making at school and today they had a big picnic with the dolls they made. The children helped prepare the sandwiches and snacks for the picnic as well. Satvinder has been excited about this all week. Here is Satvinder with her doll, Cindy.

More Fun; Less Stuff

The New American Dream website has inspired me in various ways to re-evaluate my purchasing habits and the amount of stuff I own. Today I cleared out a lot of stuff that we don't need. And while you can't really tell yet by looking at my house, it feels much better. There was so much that we don't use and don't need that I was happy to donate to those who do have an actual need.

That website offers the motto "More fun; less stuff" to encourage us to live life rather than focusing so much on being good consumers. If you haven't yet watched The Story of Stuff, really - you should watch it. I mentioned in my blog before - and it is information we all need to be aware of.

Another good motto I found on the New American Dream site was:

Every dollar I spend is a statement about the kind of world I want and the quality of life I value

That's something I am continually working with. It takes a lot of thought and effort to counter the automatic buying response that is so ingrained in many of us. But that statement is powerful to me. One way or another our money speaks to our values - consciously or unconsciously.

Recently, I purchased 3 pair of synthetic underwear because the advertising was clever! It told me that seasoned travelers wear these certain underwear. Why? Because they don't ride up and they are easy to wash and dry! I thought, "OH! I NEEEEED those for my India trip!" When they arrived, Mangala laughed at me and asked why I bought plastic underwear. I tried really hard to remember why I needed them and finally realized that I was suckered by the advertising!

Soooo.....I'll just keep trying!

Help is on the way!

Satvinder is singing a song to her Bobble Head toys. I always like to hear her dialogs. Here is today's song:

I'll help you find your way
Don't worry
Don't worry
I'll help you find your way

I'll help you with what you need
today and every day
That's for real

If someone doesn't like it
I'll tell them it is really important
I'll help you
Hooray
Hooray

I learned how to help
when I was a little toddler
We were so helping
we were
we were

Don't worry
I'll help you now
I'll help you now
I'll help

Happy Easter

Desert Gardens

We spent some time at the Botanical Gardens today.
Big Cacti or tiny people?

This time of year there is a Butterfly Pavillion

and some cool stick structures by this guy: www.stickwork.net

The Fountains

The fountains outside our nearest movie theater are always a big hit (maybe even more so than the movies.) Today Satvinder and I saw "Horton Hears a Who" (or as Satvinder calls it, "Hella Hula", since she keeps forgetting the actual name) and then had fountain time.

Spring Break

Satvinder is on Spring Break this week and her Dadiji (Mangala's mom) is visiting from Minnesota. Here are some pics:

This might be...

...the most clever commercial ever.

Pi Day Pie

It is 3/14...Pi Day. (Since Pi can be rounded to 3.14, 3/14 has come to be Pi day.) In honor of Pi, we took the opportunity to eat Pie.

One Foot in Front of the Other

Step by step...this journey is unfolding. It is not easy and the intensity of it is not letting up. Not for one day, not for one minute. I can't really explain why it is so big. But it is.

The dates are set for India. Mangala Sadhu Sangeet is going with me. We will go next month. In addition to the Golden Temple, I hope to go to Goindwal and do the 84 steps. That, in itself, is something big - and I don't know if there is really any way to prepare. It is a process of prayer at a sacred place - reciting Japji Sahib(song of the soul) on each of the steps that lead down to a pool of water. After each recitation, you dip in the water - to do this for all 84 steps can take 17-24 hours. It is said to wash away 8.4 million lifetimes of karma.

In researching it, I found two accounts of personal experience that I enjoyed. If you are interested in reading about others' experiences with this:
www.ourtruetales.com
or
www.healing source.com - Sangeet, who wrote this one, is the Chairwomen of the Board of the non-profit organization I work for.

If it is meant to be for me on this trip, it will happen. I'm definitely feeling called to it. So we'll see.

The biggest challenge for me in all of this still is in facing the separation from Satvinder. If I didn't truly believe that this trip will benefit our whole family, that it is the best thing I can do for all of us...there is no way I could do it.

Satvinder is excited about it all. Out of nowhere, she will smile at me and say, "When you are in India, I will be loving you." No hesitation about any of this in her eyes - just love.

Get Out of Town

We went to Sedona today.

Mission 1: Find pretty rocks

Mission 2: Open your heart so that you may see the hearts

Mission 3: Get dog and child to face the camera at the same time

It is good to get out of the city now and then.

The Packet is IN the Mail!

Today I checked off a big item that has been on my "to do" list for a few years now. I completed my final requirement for doula certification through DONA and put all my stuff in the mail to them. It is done.

Doula certification through DONA involves courses in doula training, childbirth education, breastfeeding education/training, reading numerous books, attending and documenting births, getting evaluations from parents, doctors, midwives & writing essays. It can take a couple months before they get my packet all reviewed and approved - before I am actually officially certified. But I'm just so pleased to have it done.

I've been wanting to do this for several years and for at least a couple years, it seemed pretty intimidating. Now, to have done it, to be on the other side of the process - is a great thing.

For those of you who have been a part of this process or who have encouraged me along the way, I thank you deeply.

Hair Polls

Lately it seems that part of Satvinder's day at school involves polling classmates on whether or not they like her hairstyle. We've been trying out different styles just for fun and each day she gives me a report when I pick her up.

"Everybody liked my hair today. The girls liked it and the boys liked it."

or

"The girls liked my hair but the boys thought it was weird."

And that always leads to the discussion that the most important opinion of herself is her own. I am grateful to find that she is quite happy - not only with her hair, but also with her self...as well she should be.

The answers that come

In times of despair, that is often when we get the clearest guidance. Maybe because that is when we pray the hardest and that is when we are actually willing to make the efforts needed for change.

I had such an experience over this past weekend. It led me to pray hard for an answer, "What do I do?" The answer that came is that I need to go to India and pray at the Golden Temple, the most powerful place I have ever experienced, the most beautiful place to make the prayer of your heart.

Despite the fact that I am terrified to do this - to make this trip, to be away from Satvinder, to step into this unknown journey...I am taking steps towards it.

I am not sure where it is leading or when it is meant to happen. (I feel like the answer to that is "soon" but there are so many things that have to fall into place). Right now I am starting by looking for someone to travel with. And while you might think someone would keep their passport in a location that is safe and sensible, I am finding that I have not done that. So working on locating my passport...

When I went to India before, I was terrified as well. I felt like I was dying. And I was, in a sense. It transformed me - I came back a different person. I have to remember that now - that death is part of change - and that life cannot be ruled by fear. At least, I am choosing not to let mine be.

This is the place that calls to me:

School Carnival

Pictures from yesterday at the annual school carnival.
I think this was probably the first time Satvinder has ever had cotton candy. She found it quite exciting.

It looks like Satvinder and Maria were catching each other.

Nirankar and Satvinder with heart, rainbow, glitter facepainting. What could be better when you are a little girl?

Guess who found the reptile booth?