In case you are wondering...

I thought I'd answer the questions I am getting the most often, regarding the baby. Some of our choices are different than how things are most commonly done in this society so I've provided a little bit of explanation.

Ultimately, I feel parents have to make the choices that are most appropriate for their family, beliefs, and circumstances. I do not propose that there is any right way...I actually don't think there IS any one right way. And there are always unexpected surprises in birth and parenthood so any "plans" must be made with the understanding that life may have other plans in store!

That said, here are our "plans":

1. Do you know if it is a boy or a girl?
Nope. We are not planning to find out. Unless some concerning issue arises that needs further investigation, we are not planning to have an ultrasound. There are varying opinions/studies on the risks vs. benefits or routine ultrasound. If you are interested, you can research it.

Oh the mystery! (I know...this is hard for my mom!) I most often feel it is a boy but who the heck knows. It's a baby and that's really all I care! Yay! It's a baby!

2. What are you going to name the baby?
We will name the baby in much the same way Satvinder was named. When Satvinder was born, our spiritual teacher, the Siri Singh Sahib (Yogi Bhajan) was still living and we asked him to name her. Since his passing, he has given that task to someone he trained in the process of determining a person's spiritual name - a name that speaks to the person's highest path in life and serves as a reminder each time they are called by that name. More info: What is a spiritual name?

As a parent, I really appreciate this approach because it takes my own ego and preferences out of it. It is truly about this child and who they are in the highest sense. Getting out of the way, as a parent, and letting the child be who they are is a constant learning process and I feel that this is one way to set the intention.

I do also feel that parents (and especially mothers) can be capable of having a sensitivity to the sound of there child, if that makes sense in terms of name. When I was pregnant with Satvinder, I kept feeling like her name would be something like Savitri or Sarv Varta. Then when she was named by our teacher, she was Satvinder, a name with very similar sounds and letters. That experience just made me trust the process even more.

So yes...yet another mystery!

3. Where are you having the baby?
We are planning a home birth with midwives. Wow - there's a lot I could say about this choice. But I suspect most of you are probably already familiar with some of the considerations involved in birth and prenatal care. If not, then I'm just going to encourage you to research it. (A good place to start is by watching The Business of Being Born and that should launch you pretty well into this vast topic.)

I absolutely LOVE home births - the peace, comfort, privacy, freedom, continual support of people I chose, respect, kindness, and allowance for the natural process. For me, this feels like the safest and best match.

With Satvinder, I was planning a home birth but had to transfer to the hospital towards the end of the labor. My experience of actually birthing at home has been only as a supporting witness, as a doula. I've learned a lot from the women I have witnessed in birth (in any location!) and am so grateful for the ways they helped me heal and grow (in addition to sharing such sacred life experiences, of course!) My study of birth has largely been a personal journey of processing and preparing for the possibility of birthing again...hopefully at home.

All birth is sacred. All birth is beautiful. I am grateful for all prayers towards our intentions for this soul's journey.

Birds of Prey

Yesterday we went to the Birds of Prey demonstration at the Flagstaff Arboretum and enjoyed meeting the birds. The Arboretum is tucked sweetly into the Pines - it was cool and rainy but held off the rain long enough for the bird show. How very cooperative of the the clouds.
We especially like owls.




Satvinder wasn't quite as sure about this close up...

This bird was trained to take money from children...if they offer it.

Flagstaff is Great in the Summer

We're house-sitting in Flagstaff for a week and it is reeeeeally nice. Today is especially excellent - overcast, bits of rain, and cooler temps. Some friends from Phoenix came up for the weekend. We hiked a trail in the woods near Snow Bowl and got rained on, which I loved and Satvinder hated.

Here is a sampling of pics - I've put more pictures on Facebook - so those of you who use FB can see them all there if you like.

Kids with Sticks - Satvinder and Ananda

Our family on the hike

Group pic

Satvinder's face (complete with water drops on the nose!)shows how she felt about being rained on.

I have Arrived in the Happy-land!

I am very pleased to share that I have finally turned the corner and am totally in the bliss of pregnancy: feeling really goooood and really grateful. I am almost giddy with joy. Really!

This weekend was great for us - our 120 day party felt like a lovely blanket of smiles and support. And Sunday, Satvinder and I attended the graduation of the Yoga Teacher Training class, and I always enjoy honoring people when they complete that journey. It was a great weekend of celebration.

Now we are looking forward to some upcoming trips - most immediately to Flagstaff. It's 115 degrees here in Phoenix today (people might think I'm glowing...but I'm probably just sweating!) It is always such a relief to enjoy a cooler climate and the opportunity to be outdoors.

Thanks to all who have given us support, well wishes and smiles - in person or from a distance. It has been felt and so much appreciated. I just feel so grateful that this child is coming - after years of prayer, this is a reality! Wow!

Here's a few pics from our Phoenix 120 day celebration:



We had an excellent selection of yummy food at the potluck. Check out this home-made mama shaped bread - adorable!

Blessing Necklace - everyone chose a bead and offered a prayer or blessing, creating a necklace for me.

The finished necklace - I love it.

Chanting one of my favorite shabds, Dhan Dhan, which celebrates miracles. This child is absolutely a miracle so this was the one thing I wanted to sing.

Satvinder was quite the social one - chatting up the guests and looking lovely in her blue party dress.

Celebration Henna

Today is the Phoenix celebration for our 120th day. Our friend, Emily, gifted us with Henna by JoAnna in honor of the occasion. I have known about JoAnna for several years, seeing her belly henna on other pregnant women, and knew that if I ever was blessed to be pregnant again, I would want to have her henna my belly. So I am extra happy we got to do this and grateful that Emily made the wish a reality! And more celebrating to come...

The Coming of the Soul

You come as a reminder, in this dim pre-dawn morning, that the life I've been locked into is not the only way. You come as a reminder that I can choose to do better. I move through a process of recalling my own life - remembering and forgetting, of drawing blame and then forgiving, of knowing we all, as parents and family, do the best we can. And sometimes, as I can see in myself, our best is just not always that good. You tell me that I can choose to do more. I trust you and I move as you guide me - looking and loving and feeling and praying. Then crying. Because the truth is hard but it's worth it.

Smiling through the tears, I feel you with me. A vast expanse - space but not empty - so very very full. Blue grey expanse - an ocean of stillness and peace. Rich, deep, and beautiful. This is time and space before? beyond? human form. Yet I know you and then I rest with you.

We are together as the sun rises - me and you and your sister. I feel you flutter inside and your sister's hand reaches to touch my belly while she sleeps. You come as a reminder that there is so much more. And I speak, "Welcome."

Lost Tooth #2: Literally Lost